As Loud as Silence

Alright guys, this is one i wrote a couple of months ago...

traveling in a crowded bus
everyone talking
everyone eating
some sleeping
some just thinking.

i look around and see so many faces
i look around and see so many faces i dont recognize
faces i just dont know.

friends talking to friends
i sit in noise
i sit in silence
learning to tune out the insignificance
learning to tune out the meaningless

in reality who do i even have besides myself
i am my own friend
i am my own best friend

i smile to so many people
i put in the effort but no one budges
its almost as if they told eachother not to socialize with me
as they barely even acknowledge me, i slowly fade back into my seat.
i slowly fade back into my seat and just stare out the window
i slowly fade back into my seat and just pretend to want to be alone.

arriving to dinner who will i sit beside
everyone has someone
everyone but me
i have no one
they all have me if they need me but i still have no one.

and as i sat at the dinner table
the faces begin to smile
not knowing where to sit at first
because everyone had a seat plus one
and as i stood there scared to make a move and be rejected
a smiling face makes its way through the crowd

finally a friendly face
atleast a friendly face for the mean time

people change.
people always change
change their mind
change a choice
it all changes
its only a matter of time until this friendly face blends into the crowd

back on the bus and the noise begins again
its all white noise
but now i know
now i know not to engage into the conversations
now i know to go straight into my seat and sink
sink into my seat
sink into the screen infront of me

plugging myself in
creating my own little world for the night
creating my own little escape for the night
and as the music is blasting through my ears
the lyrics become clear
the message becomes clear

because life is too short to even care at all
this cough syrup is found
now its all down to a choice
take one more spoon full
or throw it down the drain
...